Making Big Choices Series: Relationships

The making big choices series is something I would like to look at fortnightly. I feel as part of a young generation, we seek for help and advice in many areas and today's topic is just one of many.

I don't tend to write about love myself but having gone through some big changes to do with love recently, I feel I need to make closure by writing this.

I think when you get into relationships especially long term, there’s always this stigma that you’ll be what they say “together forever” and then you start to talk about those dreams and wishes you have for the future. Sometimes, this is great and if you end up together forever then congratulations.

But what are you supposed to do when everything is not what it seems, when the future starts to disappear or you can’t actually see it? What if you’re in your relationship but you’re actually “stuck” in it? What if you are not happy anymore

Here are some pointers to help you out:

1. Know for sure that this is what you want.

If you need a break or some time to think then think about it. At the end of the day, it’s a big choice and you need to know whether it’s right or whether you’re overthinking. Try to list out the positives and negatives about being with your partner. Talk to others and see what they think. Then, make your choice

2. The phrase “honesty is the best policy” is 100% accurate on this occasion!

Don’t mess your partner around, don’t cheat on them and don’t especially do anything you don’t want to do. You could end up leading them on or actually worse. Let them know how you feel and keep them updated, at the end of the day your partner cares for you, even if you don’t think so.

3. Talk to people around you, look after yourself

Keep your mental health on a high, remember whatever choice you made was done to make you happy. Although it’s hard to not feel guilty, keep going and know that what’s happened and happening is not your fault. Keep your parents and loved ones informed and updated with how you’re feeling. Spend time with them and that cuddle you didn’t get to have with your pet or your sibling last week, give a cuddle. It really does help.

4. Once it’s over, get yourself out there and enjoy being you

Its literally the saying “new year, new you”. Get on your favourite shirt or your skin tight dress, do your hair and makeup and GO OUT! You can’t make this stop you from having fun and I know that you’re scared of rubbing it in their face that you’re enjoying life, don’t be afraid and let them stop you. Dance the night away, socialise and enjoy being young.

5. Focus on what’s important in life, know what you want in life and don’t waste a moment

Whether you’re studying, working or just having some time out. Look at what you would like in life and explore it. Do some research of that university you’ve wanted to go to. Research that place miles away to do that work experience that intrigues you. Go travelling or even book a holiday. It’ll all be worth it in the end.

6. Find something new to explore or do

New hobby? New interest? You decide.

These are 6 tips I recommend you think about. If you need more help than just a website blog, look at Childline, look at other places, speak to adults or someone you trust. If you need help then make sure you talk too. It’s hard and heartbreaks aren’t easy, I know that but don’t be afraid either. You deserve the world.

Sent from my iPhone